Surviving the Holidays after the Death of a Loved One

by Amy Rosen

The holidays are coming and this is the my first year without Mom. I have mourned the passing of a father, husband, brother-in-law, and now my mom, someone who used to be a big part of the holiday season died this year. And now the holidays are looming like the crest of a huge ocean wave, threatening to take me and my holiday memories under with it. What do I do? How do I walk that perilous shoreline of grief while everyone around me seems to have an intact family, with everyone alive and happy? And it gets compounded every time I turn on the TV or open a magazine, and see all those other family units in technicolor joy, underlining over and over exactly what I’m missing.

I know that I’m not alone. And there is a way to get through this. It will not be simple, easy or carefree. But I will get through it. And “maybe” next year will be easier. This year I know will be the hardest. This year I will be more aware of missing my mom. I will start to heal, and find ways to move that healing along a bit more every time an occasion comes up.

So, in that spirit, this year, on my Thanksgiving and Christmas Eve tables, I will light a special candle for all you who have lost a family member, and will say a prayer from my heart that consolation and peace will come to comfort you.

I’m going to take a deep breath and brace myself for that wave effect.

Please contact your physician or local hospice organization for information on and referral to bereavement groups and services.

Labels: bereavement, holidays, home care, hospice

posted @ 11:19 AM
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